Is it so sad for me to eat dinner in a restaurant alone? Apparently, people at restaurants think it is.
This is not the first time I've been given pity looks when I am eating alone. Tonight, it was Cracker Barrel, a fitting name, since I only ever see white people eat there. That's not to say that any other race doesn't eat there, it's just that I never see 'em. Anyhow, this is about me. Eating alone. Getting pity looks from the hostess when she asks "How many?" Am I the only person who ever eats alone? I guess so.
It happened once before at a Denny's. When I told the hostess, "One, please," she even said "Really?" before catching herself in her incredulousness. I wanted to be rude, but I couldn't, because I was absofuckingloutely gobsmacked. I gave the waitress a good tip, though, because she was friendly and didn't treat me like some poor soul whose date stood her up or something.
Another time this happened, I was at the theater to see Grindhouse. This story is actually funnier than the other two. I was waiting in my seat for the show to start, and this lady with her two dude-pals sat next to me. Right away, she turned to me and asked me if I was alone. I said that I was. She said, "Oh, honey, that's so sad! All alone at the theater, no man to take you out." I replied that, in fact, all of my friends were either out of town or working and there was just no one to go to the movies with. She nodded and gave me a quiet "mmm-hmm" in understanding. Had she said only that to me for the whole night, I would have lumped it in with the sad stories. However, during the big reveal of a certain actor in Grindhouse, she turned to me, nudged my arm and said in a loud whisper "Bruce Willis, MMM-HMM!" That made my night, as well as the fact that she wished me a good night when the movie was over.
Why can't everyone be more like Bruce Willis Lady? Just. . .let me be alone at the theater or at the restaurant, enjoying myself with my favorite person.