IT'S TAX SEASON RAGE TIME.

RAGE MOTHERFUCKERS.

I am confuse. How does someone without gainful employment (not working, not getting unemployment, not getting SSI or food stamps - NADA) and currently living at the local Econo Lodge (no shit) get a refund anticipation loan check of over $3600? This is something that has always bothered me about working for this place, among countless other things: how does this happen? WHOSE RESPONSIBLE THIS?

I want to call some of these places and ask them just how a customer can get that much money. Because I am pissed. Because I am JEALOUS.

Rant about dumbfuck people who don't listen

I am sick and tired of people who do not listen when I speak. When I tell you the four requirements to take out a loan, don't give me three of them and expect that I'll give you the loan on the understanding that you'll bring me that fourth piece of information when you feel like it. That is not how this works.

Also, when I ask you to provide further information for me to process your loan, you can either comply politely, or get the fuck out. The more attitude you give me, the less willing I am to help you. If your bank statement shows that your account has been overdrawn for more than 60 days straight, I am going to need a letter or document from the bank showing that your account is still open. Most banks can close your account if it has been overdrawn for 30 days straight, so I'm just ensuring that you are not trying to take out a loan on an account that is closed and that I cannot collect on should it get sent to the bank.

If I ask for something and say that you need to have it with you to originate a loan, you better have it with you. Don't sass me, don't say you'll provide it later, don't give me any fucking attitude about it, or I will find a way to turn you down for this loan. I don't have to play nice if you won't do me the same courtesy.

What is all the commotion?

Sometimes I think my upstairs neighbors like being loud just for the sake of being loud. It's not my thing. First of all, I live alone, so I don't have anyone to yell at/to. Second, I can take three steps without falling over or crashing into something. Okay, I don't know if that's exactly what they're doing up there, but it sure sounds like it. Third, when it's sexy time: a) it's just me so; b) it's not as bed-shakingly, floor squeakingly obnoxious.

I just don't get it. These aren't huge apartments. You can't tell me that it's impossible for the person/people you're living with to hear you in another room if you use a normal speaking voice. And if the other person is hard of hearing, then you can't tell me it's too hard to get up and go to that person to speak to them. Oh wait, I guess it is, since it seems you have a serious equilibrium problem.

And I'm not opposed to people having sex. But there are quiet hours here and they start around 10-10:30 pm. If you have the right to fuck like noisy animals, then I have the right to play 'Yakety Sax' at a similar volume level. Them's the rules.

Sometimes, things just go your way

Or they go my way, as shown in the following case.

A couple of days ago, I was looking at three upcoming bills that were due two and three days before my next paydate.

Hey, is "paydate" one word that I just made up, or is it supposed to be two separate words? I tend to forget. Anyhow. . .

So was looking at these bills and thinking to myself, "do I want to risk sending these bills in on time, but with bad checks? or do I want to send them in a little late but with good checks?" I like paying bills on time, you see, but I also like paying them with money I know I already have. I realize that companies tend to give you grace days on bills, but I don't like to use them.

The point is, I was getting stressed. I wondered, "why don't companies just make your bills due on your paydate, like a payday loan?" but then I realized that payday loans don't even fall on your paydate at some payday loan companies. They're just due every two weeks, regardless. I know this information, because I myself work for a payday loan company. Sometimes, it's a kick-ass job. More often than not, however, it's a PITA.

But I digress. The point really is, the very same day I was stressing about bills, I find out that I have a $750 check for mileage waiting to be deposited into my account. It seems that, yet again, I fall into a pile of horseshit and come out smelling like a pretty lady. This happens to me a lot. I'm certainly not going to complain about it; quite the contrary.

I took myself and a friend out for a shopping spree. I got her some belated birthday gifts, and some cool shit for myself as well, and I paid my bills before they were due. In other words, once again, I am pretty much awesome.